Emotionally Focused Therapy

What is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?

EFT is a powerful, effective model for therapy,  grounded in the idea that in relationships, we are all motivated by how connected, assured and safe we feel with the people we love.  When the connective bonds are broken or haven’t been formed securely early on with a primary caregiver, they affect how we interpret, react and respond to the world and our most significant relationships. This theory of attachment holds the frame of EFT work with my clients. After utilizing many different approaches to therapy over the years, the transformative impact that I saw from EFT inspired me to delve deeper into learning about it and being trained in it. 

COUPLES THERAPY 

Just as you would visit a physical therapist to help a physical injury heal, seeking counseling is an active step towards helping your damaged relationships heal.  Choosing to improve your relationships in therapy will not be easy but it will be worth it.  It will take work to move away from a cycle of conflict and reactivity towards safety, intimacy and connection and new and better ways of relating.  When you engage in the process, you are making an investment in yourself as well: to grow in self-awareness, embrace change and experience healing as you explore new and better ways of being.  People don’t normally think of therapy as an investment. However, when you show up in therapy to do the work, you are making an investment in the most important relationships in your life! 

When couples come to therapy, they are usually stuck in habitual ways of dealing with their emotions and with each other.  As they continue to feel increasingly stuck in their relationship, they start to feel more frustrated, anxious, angry and distressed.  As these painful feelings deepen, they begin to feel more disconnected and more alone in what seems like an unending cycle of negative interactions.  If this describes some of what you might be feeling in your relationship, EFT may be able to help! 

With EFT,  we can work together on:  

  • Creating a safe place for you to start understanding why you got stuck

  • Exploring the ways that you interact that contribute to this negative cycle

  • Getting to the heart of what’s underneath these destructive patterns of interaction

  • Moving your conflicts from a heated, overwhelming state to a less reactive and calmer space

  • Learning how to be more accessible and available to your partner

  • Practicing how to be more responsive and understanding with your partner

  • Addressing unfulfilled needs and longings in your relationship

  • Being more engaged and connected with each other

With the help of therapy, you can identify and avoid the patterns that threaten your connection, restore your love and sense of security through empathy and develop a deeper intimacy through new ways of being with each other.

Let's get started!

“Struggle can be our greatest call to courage and the clearest path to a wholehearted life.”

—Brené Brown